Sad week

I had the hardest decision to make this past week. My business has been slowing down and it's very dependent upon the real estate market. I see this huge real estate bubble popping soon and know that it'll be very difficult for me to continue working independently.

So, I was faced with a choice. Continue on the pace we were working at and end up in the hole money-wise, or give everyone a bonus and allow them to get a job while jobs are still available.

I chose to punt. I let my tech go this week and it was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. I care a great deal about what happens to him and his family. I felt like I let everyone down by making this decision - but deep down I feel like it was the right one. J & I cried when A left - and writing this blog entry isn't easy for me either. It's been a very emotional week. I know you're supposed to keep business business but it's hard when you impact people's livelihoods - especially the ones you care a great deal for.

So, I'm floating my resume around and have an interview set up this coming Wednesday. Wish me luck as I'm going to try to go work for someone else for the first time in six and a half years. Half of me is excited while the other half is very disappointed.

I guess the upside is that I'll actually get some sort of health care that doesn't cost $1000 a month. Then there's the chance of working for someplace and actually work up to a retirement. I still have time to do that, but (ugh) I hate even thinking that I'd be the type of person who counted down the years till retirement. After paying for my own health insurance though, it just may be worth selling out if the trade off is having retirement health insurance benefits.